Do You Feel Exhausted At The End Of The Day?

“Why are you exhausted at the end of the day? You only take care of your child! ” If someone tells you that, you should definitely defend yourself, because according to experts , mothers’ exhaustion is justified. You could call it stress from constant hyper-vigilance.

If you also add responsibilities such as work and household chores, it is not so strange that many mothers become exhausted. However, many feel that they can not “complain” about their fatigue and stress if they choose to stay at home for a few months or years to focus on the children.

It is as if you have no right to feel exhausted at the end of the day; as if feeding, caring, guarding, guiding and teaching would be so incredibly easy. As if mothers just need to take a closer look at their children.

But it’s not.

To begin with, how can we define this stress from constant hyper-alertness that most mothers feel? It is a mental and emotional hypersensitivity that has a very specific goal: to detect and prevent threats and dangers.

This psychological stress drains you of energy, makes you feel more tired than usual and can even make you act more irritable than usual.

The interesting thing about all of this is that this stress is normally associated with “soldiers and war-like circumstances.”

• A soldier must be aware of all the possible threats that exist around. They must observe, care for, anticipate and always be on the alert to survive and keep their comrades safe.

• When the constant alert state is maintained for several weeks or months, it generates a lot of stress, resulting in extreme fatigue and mental exhaustion.

The same thing happens in parenting. It may seem ironic, but it is not. New mothers and fathers must be on the alert so that a newborn child, for example, receives food every three hours.

• They have to comfort them at night and sometimes get up to see that “everything is okay” or because they thought they heard crying.
• As children grow, the dangers increase and you have to be prepared for everything. You have to make sure that the child does not swallow certain objects, that she does not fall, that she does not climb, that she does not overturn the crib…

You are exhausted at the end of the day because all your emotions are used as a radar 24 hours a day. It’s not just about taking care of vital needs such as feeding and changing nappies.

It is mainly a mental pressure, a desire for everything to be good, that our children should be safe, happy, peaceful… because sometimes a little carelessness leads to an accident or a fall, and it can cause a lot of stress.

So if someone criticizes the fact that you feel exhausted at the end of the day, you should defend yourself. Your job is a bit like a soldier on a battlefield: you have to guarantee the safety of what is dearest to you: your child.

Being a mother is a job that goes beyond the 24 hours of the day. It’s something you’ve known for a long time, but you also know that the job as a mother makes you happy and is the best thing that has happened to you.

It is important that you can give your best to your children, so here are some tips:

• Delegate tasks: Raising children is as much the responsibility of the mother as the father. If you are single, do not hesitate to ask your family for help when you need it.
• Do not overestimate the dangers: Do not imagine that the worst will happen, it just prevents you from sleeping at night in the belief that the baby will fall out of bed or be suffocated by his blanket. Focus on calm things.
• Do not spend all your time at home. Go out with your child whenever you can, meet friends or sign up for activities you can do with your baby (such as yoga with children).

• Try to take care of yourself. Take the chance to rest when your child is resting. A few minutes with eyes closed on the couch gives you new energy and clears the mind a bit.

Do not let yourself be influenced by what others say. You have the right to complain and even ask for help if you feel overwhelmed.

Try to do something during the day that is enjoyable and relaxing: read a book, take a walk… you are not a bad mother because you rest for half an hour a day.